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Everything I Know About Menopause
So, I don’t want to disappoint you, but what I know about menopause is basically nothing. You’d think, maybe, that since I’m a female person who is fairly well-educated and has managed to live to be over a half a century old that I’d know something about menopause. Welp, not so much. What I know…
Read MoreSometimes You Have To Pivot
The last year of my life has been, let’s say, tumultuous. I think. Honestly, I had to look up the word. So, yeah, “emotional, change, uncertainty, loud.” Loud? Yeah, kind of loud in a metaphorical sense. The synonyms really drive it home: “hectic, stormy, turbulent.” But, here’s the good news, I survived. Maybe my favorite…
Read MoreRegular, Ordinary, Boring Love
The only other person I can think of who loves romantic comedies as much as I do is Mindy Lahiri from The Mindy Project, and she’s fictional, she’s also my best friend, but that’s a story for another day. Look, I love all the trappings of two people falling in love. I’m a sucker for…
Read MoreA Quick Guide for Staying Young
If you’re anywhere near middle aged, you are assaulted on the daily with miracle anti-aging serums and creams to keep you young. Now, all of these are bullshit, and, also, I buy many of them. Both things can be true. But I’m starting to think that maybe staying young has almost nothing to do with…
Read MoreMiddle School in the 80s
If the title of this doesn’t instantly traumatize you, you probably weren’t a teenager in the 80s. I don’t know a single person who grew up in the 80s who liked middle school. Or at least a single girl. I really had no idea what the boys were up to, other than not being into…
Read MoreA Post Breakup Letter to My Forties
Dear Forties, Hello. Hello. It’s me. I know things have been over between us for a few weeks, but I feel like there’s so much we left unsaid, and, I’ll just say it, I miss you. I know, I know, I know. You told me that I would. That as bad as things got towards…
Read MoreAnd, Just Like That, She’s Off
I guess I expected it would be easier this time. After all, it was my second child going to college, right? I had already explored the push and pull of wanting them to start their lives, but also longing for them to stay close that is the hallmark of parenting. Surely I’d be fine at…
Read MoreScattered Thoughts on My First Pandemic
Hey there, I’m new to pandemics, and let me just say, I’m not a fan. Right? I’ll be honest with you, I spent the last 3+ years doing some intentional social distancing for a lot of reasons. I’m not saying that this pandemic is my fault, but I did very vocally declare 2020 to be…
Read MoreGen Xers, Unite! Or Don’t. Whatever.
You’ve got to hand it to Gen Xers. We have been so ambivalent about everything we have finally been totally forgotten. I saw some nonsense poll on the news about generations and they had Baby Boomers, Millennials, and Gen Z. I was like, “Well, holy crap, they’ve just stopped acknowledging we exist.” This should surprise…
Read MoreMy (Not At All Far-Fetched) Turning 50 Plan
I have decided tonight that my plan for turning 50 in seven months is simple. I’m going to get incredibly fit. (I’m not.) I’m picking now because all those other years when I was younger were too easy. (I was lazy then too.) I like a challenge. (I promise you, I don’t.) And I think,…
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