I Wish I Packed My Army Green Pants, A Memoir

I Wish I Packed My Army Green Pants 

-A Memoir by M.Blazoned

Six days, a 35 lb. bag, and three pairs of indigo wash jeans she is allergic to, Meredith has a sinking feeling she blew the entire thing by leaving her army green pants behind. This heartwarming tale that is truly as old as time will have you laughing through your tears at the complex and surprising reasons we pack what we do and the subtle and sometimes depressing consequences of the last minute decision to pare down. Meredith’s story of loss, unrequited self-love, and, yes, packing mistakes that make her legs itch all week, will have you nodding your head as you see yourself in her quest for understanding, answers, and, ultimately, redemption for why she never ever gets it right. 

Just in time for the holidays. The perfect gift for everyone on your list.

Time Magazine calls it, “Genius. A deeply universal story of regret.”

Real Simple hails it, “This is every woman…and every man who thinks he only needs one pair of pants and no long sleeves.”

People Magazine cheers, “Kudos to M. for bravely showing us what happens when you doubt yourself while packing.”

Sports Illustrated declares, “This story embodies the agony and ecstasy that sports can only hope to capture.”

Entertainment Weekly raves, “We are all those missing Army Green Pants and this memoir should be optioned immediately for a major motion picture, starring M. herself.”

Psychology Today applauds, “The sheer honesty and breadth of emotion is inspirational for all those who seek a deeper understanding of #thestruggleisreal.”


  1. Marla on November 19, 2016 at 8:45 pm

    Sounds like Elaine writing for the j peterman catalog!

    • M. on November 20, 2016 at 10:45 am

      How do I love you? Anything Elaine related is a huge compliment!

  2. Susan Farrington on November 19, 2016 at 7:22 pm

    One time I packed 13 bags of various sizes for my family of 4. My husband gave me a lot of crap about it and photographed me with all the bags giving him the middle finger….hey-everyone had everything they needed and all were happy.
    Always pack the army green pants darlin’

    LOVE your writing!

  3. Jim on November 19, 2016 at 1:12 pm

    If you read only one memoir this year, make it this one!