I Wish I Packed My Army Green Pants  -A Memoir by M.Blazoned Six days, a 35 lb. bag, and three pairs of indigo wash jeans she is allergic to, Meredith has a sinking feeling she blew the entire thing by leaving her army green pants behind. This heartwarming tale that is truly as old as…

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My left boob is so much bigger than my right boob that I don’t even know what is going on anymore. It used to be subtle but now I fear people look at me and suddenly their subconscious screams out to them over and over again…lefty, lefty, lefty. And they are trying not to accidentally…

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Here’s the deal. I’m a woman. I have all the right parts and a decent amount of estrogen to prove it. And yet, I don’t have any interest in decorating my house. Yes, home decorating is just one of the many things our society associates with the X-chromosome for reasons that both perplex and frustrate…

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Turns out 45 years old is just 45 years old. An age that means you are old enough to not feel young anymore, but not old enough to complain about it. It’s like the middle child of ages…no one is impressed or thinks your turning forty-five is a big deal but you. Today I’m forty-five…

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Don’t get me wrong, I’ll happily take a massage and a shout out from the kiddos on Mother’s Day, but after fourteen years, I’ve figured out why it exhausts me too. I’ve boiled it down to these four reasons. I hate the question, “What do you want to do?” There’s too much pressure and expectation. The Mother…

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So, my friend invited me to a Better Than Ezra concert. She said something like, “Hey, I won four tickets on the radio to see Better than Ezra, do you and Dan want to go?” Now I’m paraphrasing here, but the important part to understand is that the words “Little, Black, Dress, and/or Party” were never spoken, in…

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My thighs and I have a troubled relationship. There is a great deal of blame, suspicion and betrayal between us. When did things get so bad? Whose fault is it? “How could you have done this to me!” we both shout at each other in our morning mirror routine. It wasn’t always this way. In…

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