Continuous Improvement Is A Hard Pass

If you’re a human, I’ve got news for you, you are incompatible with continuous improvement. I know they want you to believe that this is a real thing and not just some corporate buzzword, but you’re not a process, you’re a person, and you literally can’t continuously improve. Now, if you are a great lover…

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Sometimes You Have To Pivot

The last year of my life has been, let’s say, tumultuous. I think. Honestly, I had to look up the word. So, yeah, “emotional, change, uncertainty, loud.” Loud? Yeah, kind of loud in a metaphorical sense. The synonyms really drive it home: “hectic, stormy, turbulent.” But, here’s the good news, I survived.  Maybe my favorite…

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Regular, Ordinary, Boring Love

The only other person I can think of who loves romantic comedies as much as I do is Mindy Lahiri from The Mindy Project, and she’s fictional, she’s also my best friend, but that’s a story for another day.  Look, I love all the trappings of two people falling in love. I’m a sucker for…

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Female Operating Manual

There’s this “cutesy” TikTok trend where young women joke with their boyfriends that making their man dinner needs an upgrade from girlfriend to wife. Ha-ha-ha…vomit.  Let’s be real people, this idea that women make dinner for their husbands is based in some 1950s fantasy of domestic bliss, well, bliss for the men, I suppose. It’s…

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Why We Love Christmas Movies

The genius of Christmas movies is that they take us on a satisfying journey from heightened expectation to crushing reality, and they do it in a way that makes us laugh or cry. You see, nothing in life disappoints you more than unrealistic expectations, and nothing in life has higher expectations than the holidays. Christmas…

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The Curious Language of “I’m Sorry”

A good decade ago, a close friend of mine came over on Easter and presented me with a platter of gorgeous gourmet cupcakes and said, “I’m sorry.” I don’t remember exactly what my response was, but I’m pretty sure it was something like, “No, I’m sorry.” It got me wondering why women speak to each…

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I Can’t Believe How Stupid Everything Is

Thirty years ago, when I was 21 and graduating from college, I naively thought the world was moving forward in the right direction. Now, I’m 51 and I can’t believe how stupid everything is. Like I can’t believe that all stores don’t adopt a first in first out queuing system. Everyone knows it’s the fairest…

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The Skinny on the Dyson Hair Dryer

Okay, M.Blazoneders (is that a thing?), I’ve heard you loud and clear. You want to know what I think of the Dyson hair dryer. Fair enough. Let’s go! As with everything I ever buy, I immediately suffer from buyer’s remorse, followed by an unreasonably long period examining the product and myself to truly understand if…

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A Quick Guide for Staying Young

If you’re anywhere near middle aged, you are assaulted on the daily with miracle anti-aging serums and creams to keep you young. Now, all of these are bullshit, and, also, I buy many of them. Both things can be true. But I’m starting to think that maybe staying young has almost nothing to do with…

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Middle School in the 80s

If the title of this doesn’t instantly traumatize you, you probably weren’t a teenager in the 80s. I don’t know a single person who grew up in the 80s who liked middle school. Or at least a single girl. I really had no idea what the boys were up to, other than not being into…

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